A restaurant is a good place to go for a first date,
particularly one that is cosy and fairly quiet. Here you
and your date will have the right atmosphere to chat, relax
and get to know each other
Avoid noisy crowded places where it will be difficult to
talk. Cinemas are also to be avoided. Without being
consciously aware of it your date could compare you with
the actors on screen whose job it is to look good for a
living.
If you must go to the cinema choose a scary film. Why?
Experiments have shown that when strangers of the opposite
sex met in situations that contain elements of danger they
rate each other as more attractive than in none dangerous
situations. We all know that sitting in the cinema isn't
dngerous. However your unconscious mind does not know this
and sees the on screen danger as real.
Remember that it's you they have asked out or accepted a
date with so do be yourself. That's the person that your
date wants to spend their evening with. You'll obviously
make an effort with your appearance before going out. Once
you are with your date concentrate on them. Be a good
listener. You can learn to do this by practising the
technique of active listening. That's the kind of listening
that therapists and counsellors use in dealing with their
clients. What's involved is giving the other person 100% of
your attention when they are speaking.
Commonly in everday conversations we only give the speaker
50% of our attention. That's because we are thinking about
what we intend to say next. You can practice active
listening in everyday conversation so it will come more
naturally to you when you are out on a date.
You can learn a lot about your date quickly if you keep
your eyes and ears open. Two human activities are only
partly under conscious control. These are eating and sex.
Your dates eating habits can give you a clue as to what to
expect in the bedroom. A date who has unusual or very
particular requirements about food normally falls into the
same category when it comes to sex.
Generally speaking the person with a balanced attitude to
eating has a similar well-adjusted attitude to sex.
If your date checks the bill, pays and leaves a reasonable
but not lavish tip this shows a sane attitude towards
money. Glancing at the bill without checking it and leaving
an unnecessarily large tip is not a positive indicator.
Neither is calculating the VAT on every portion of
vegetables. If you and your date eventually become life
partners you'll be making joint financial decisions so
knowing their attitude to money is important.
Finally look at how your date behaves towards waiters, taxi
drivers etc in other words people that she/he isn't trying
to impress. This will tell you how your date normally
treats people.
The way that your date is behaving towards you now is not a
good guide to how they will behave in future.That's because
they are currently out to impress you. Watch the way your
date behaves towards people who s/he isn't trying to
impress to get a true picture of what to expect if you
become their life partner.
----------------------------------------------------
Want to have a great first date leading to a great
relationship? If so Eileen's free Love Magnet report is for
you. Eileen is a psychologist who turned her life around in
the area of relationships using the insights of psycholgy.
She now helps people just like you to do the same. Your can
claim your free report by emailing
eileen@eileenedwards.co.uk. See also her website
http://www.eileenedwards.co.uk
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