Here you are, single again after so many years of marriage,
and with children, now, what do you do? Do you wade right
into the dating waters? Do you wait a while? If you do, how
long should you wait before you start dating? Then, what
about the children? So many questions, perhaps the
following suggestions can help you decide which road to
take.
In the case of a divorce, there are a few variables to take
into consideration. Was it an amicable divorce? Are you on
speaking terms with your ex? How do you feel about
yourself? Are you happy that you are now free, whether you
asked for the divorce or if he did? The idea of dating
again can be very intimidating, but at the same time, it
can be better than the first time so long ago. Now you know
what it is that you want or not in another relationship.
But before you decide, give yourself time to recoup,
studies suggest that a person wait several months
(approximately six months to a year), before starting to
date again, but this number is not written in stone,
actually, when to start dating depends entirely up to you
and how you feel. Even if you feel good about yourself and
you have no self esteem problem, it is always wise to give
yourself time to find your wings again.
Some of the ways to do this is by joining a club or group
that has activities that you enjoy, such as a reading club,
or join an art class, reconnect with old friends and make
new ones. Join a social club at your church or another
church that has one. Let your friends know that you are
ready to start dating again, try online dating, although
that idea might be a little scary to some, recent surveys
have shown that approximately 7 million Americans now go
online and use their dating sites and services.
If on the other hand, your self-esteem is battered, then,
before you even think of dating, you must first work on
feeling great again. Treat yourself to a makeover, try a
new hairdo, and pamper yourself for a change. Go to a Spa
for a massage, a facial, something relaxing; When you have
children, most of your energy is immersed in your job and
raising your children, which leaves you with very little
time for you, so you feel tired and un-attractive.
For both of you, the one with the positive attitude, and
you, the one with the low self esteem, make a list, either
mental or written (preferably written) of the qualities you
would like to find in a new relationship, as well as a list
of those thing you definitely do not wish to deal with
again. This will help you in not selecting someone
identical to the person you divorced which is something
many women do, and then ask themselves why they keep
failing.
Don't feel, when you start to date, that the first man you
go out with, will be your soul mate, treat the dating as
you would someone you are interviewing for a job, you do
not hire the first applicant that comes your way. Be honest
and tell the person about your children, but keep them out
of the equation, at least until you know the person better.
Ask him if he likes or has children of his own, as time
goes by, if he is going to be in your life, he will then,
also become a part of theirs, and when that time comes,
introduce him to your children slowly and as a friend.
----------------------------------------------------
Gladys Alvarez, an Internet marketer and mentor, with
forty-five years experience as a Correspondent, who has
traveled extensively around the world, has done what
hundreds of people were hoping for; the research and
legwork regarding Internet dating. Through extensive
research she has eliminated innumerable dating websites,
bringing you the results of only the very best. Gladys
invites you to visit her http://top10-onlinedating.com
website today
EasyPublish this article: http://submityourarticle.com/articles/easypublish.php?art_id=54735
0 comments
Post a Comment