Through my interviews over the years with authors like
Deepak Chopra, Barbara De Angelis, and others, my
perspective of what it means to be a "soul mate" has
changed dramatically. For the longest period of time, if
someone was my soul mate, which I was lead to believe we
all just have one, our life together would truly be bliss.
We would love each other at all times, and the
relationship, and if it was the real deal, would be close
to effortless.
Since these early beginnings, however, my beliefs have
radically changed. An example of this came over 10 years
ago as I was talking to a knowledgeable counselor on this
very topic, who blew my mind with her detailed explanation
of a soul mate relationship she had just ended.
The man she had loved deeply was the exact opposite of
anyone she could ever imagine herself with. He drank
heavily; while she was a non-drinker. He smoked; and she
had abhorred smoking. His religious beliefs were quite a
contrast to her spiritual perspective. Yet, without a
doubt, this was a soul mate in her existence.
She explained that he was amazingly filled with a depth of
spirit, a powerful sense of humor and a willingness to
admit wrong instantly when an error in his judgement was
brought to his attention. His days were filled with
humility, curiosity, and dedication to serving mankind. She
went on to tell me all that she had learned from this
amazing,and imperfect, being. She explained how their hours
of sitting in silence had brought them closer together than
any other relationship she had ever had. She learned the
power of accepting someone who was quite different, yet
filled with love. As she let the relationship go, she was
blessed that another "soul mate" had lifted her up to a
higher state of being, one filled with less judgement, more
acceptance.
Right now, slow down and reflect upon the "soul mate"
experiences that you may have encountered through past
relationships. They were divinely given to help you rise to
the next level in your life. I think one of the key
lessons I'm hearing and learning is to relinquish "who" has
the potential to truly influence your life, your growth,
when in comes to intimate relationships.
In other words, could it be possible that EVERYONE you have
ever dated or will ever date, is a soul mate? It seems to
make a lot of sense, as anyone you or I have or will date,
influences who we are and who we become. One person may
challenge your patience, while another may help you learn
how to set healthy boundaries. Someone else may be a great
teacher for you sexually, yet another may be a reflection
to you of your overpowering ego, or need to be right in all
too many disagreements. Some may show you the need to
learn to fight for love, yet another may show you how to
walk away with grace. And then there is the one who
mirrors your beauty in a fleeting comment. Another may help
you go deeper on a spiritual path, and yet another may
greatly influence how you raise kids or handle money. Love,
growth, many times comes wrapped in the most unlikely of
packages. Do you see a pattern here?
Everyone you engage with intimately, regardless for how
long, may just be a perfectly placed soul mate. If we
truly understand this, it means that every former lover was
an angel of love, helping you to not only understand
yourself and the world better, but to point you towards
that ultimate desire that is ingrained in everyone, the
search for true love. The search for Divine Union. There
are no mistakes on the path of love. Think about this.
----------------------------------------------------
David Essel, Master Life, Business and Spiritual Coach,
Motivational Speaker, Author, Adjunct Professor and
Radio/TV Host empowers people to take charge of their
lives, positively affecting the lives of many through his
motivational lectures, television segments, and his belief
that health is not just from the neck down. How can you
create an exceptional life by honoring your mind, body and
soul? Visit his website at:
http://www.davidessel.com
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