If you ask someone out for a date and they turn you down,
how much worse off are you than you were before? Apart from
perhaps a dented ego, the answer is not much. Yet we are
often inhibited by the fear of rejection into complete
inaction and therefore have no chance of experiencing that
wonderful sensation when someone agrees to go out with you.
You will soon forget the fear of rejection once it has
happened a few times to you, and it happens to us all, you
just chalk it up to experience and move on. Also it is one
of life's truisms that confident people tend to have more
success in asking for dates than shy people as their whole
body language and demeanor is attractive and this is all
part of the cycle, once you get over your fear of rejection
you will get more confident which in turn will lead to more
dates. You can still be very nervous when you ask someone
out, and this adrenalin is often a good thing but you don't
want to show it to your potential date.
Rejection is part of life and happens to every single
person at some point. If someone claims otherwise they are
full of it! All rejection means is that one particular
person does not want to go out with you. This may be for a
host of reasons that may or may not have anything to do
with the huge plaid sports coat you were wearing at the
time. The fact of the matter is that not everyone is going
to reject you. It may happen a few times but you will
succeed more than you fail.
The important thing to realize is when someone means no.
Those who reject others will usually try to sugar coat it
so as not to appear too harsh. They may say, "I'm busy
right now, call me next week" with no intention of
answering your call. Once you go through this a few times
you will recognize the cowardly rejection and move on. Bear
this in mind if you are the rejector and don't take they
easy option. If someone asks you out and it just will never
happen in a million years you can tell them no in a
charming way that leaves them with their dignity intact and
not laboring under any false illusions that you may be
interested next week. Remember you will also face rejection
at some point in your dating career so be gentle but clear.
Hopefully this article has given you some things to think
about around the difficult subject of dating rejection
fears. It is never pleasant but hopefully you can deal with
rejection and rejecting with the proper courtesy and good
grace and survive the ego bashing that at the time can be
horrendous but in the end is trivial and not to be a reason
to lose sleep.
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Patrick Attlee is a journalist who has been submitting
articles online for several years. His new website is
http://www.visco-elastic-foam-mattress.com
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