Talk is important but it is only a part of the
communication process. A lot of people feel that the only
thing you need to save your relationship from break-up is
to talk. So much in our modern culture emphasizes on 'talk'
as though it were everything.
Take a moment to think about the difference between talking
and communicating. Communicating to save your relationship
requires a speaker, a listener and messages passing between
the two. Talk is simply the medium of communication. It is
the fourth part in the process.
Many couples talk AT one another but seldom talk TO one
another. Have you ever felt that you have been talking a
lot together but you can't recall anything that was said?
To save your relationship, you need to do some self
reflection about the way you talk and change it to quality
communication.
So what does a quality message comprise? When you learn to
share your thoughts, feelings and motivation you turn talk
into real communication. See the following example when a
man approaches his partner at home.
"Can we for once turn the TV off and go to bed for a
cuddle"? His lady replies, "You only need me when I am
watching my favorite show. I bet if the football was on,
you would never say that.
It is talk for sure but not communication. The meaning of
his message lies in the answer he receives. Sharing his
thoughts, feelings and motivations could sound like this.
"You know, we watch too much TV in these rare times when we
have peace together. I feel we are drifting apart. How
about saying "Let's turn on the VCR and get up close with
each other"? "Mmm. You do the VCR and I'll go slip into
something more comfortable".
Communication is about sharing your deepest feelings and
thoughts. It is the process and experience of being
together that matters. Communication is different from talk
as talk is just simply stating daily happenings and many
times it doesn't involved intimate sharings. Unless you
share what you think, how you feel and why you are
suggesting these things your partner will assume negative
reasons and become resentful and mistrusting.
Talk alone cannot save your relationship. You have to
reflect upon the messages you send out and add in your
thoughts, feelings and motivations. When one partner starts
the open communication it is easy to ask for and get it in
return.
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Want to communicate your message in the best possible way
to save your relationship?
=> http://www.911saverelationship.com
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