You see the commercials for internet dating companies on a
daily basis. Everyone it seems has found someone or has
even married someone they met online. Once you exit the
world of persuasive corporate marketing, what is this
process really like? Is it all the happiness and romance
hinted at through the commercials?
Internet dating has been successful for some people. What
these commercials fail to advertise is that only a fraction
of those online will find "someone." Another fraction of
these will end up finding far more trouble than they
anticipate. Many dating sites are used by scammers. These
individuals seek to steal identities, exploit emotion, and
make a buck from your emotional grief.
"Romance scams" may seem like something from a fiction
novel due to the lack of attention they receive in the
news. They are a very real business online and are growing
in popularity. There are some popular methods of evaluating
the individual you've came into contact with.
The first trait is intensity. The individual claims they've
simply fallen in love with you in a short period of time,
often 24-48 hours after contact. They may claim it's
"destiny" or "fate" that brought you together. These
individuals also disappear from the dating sites once
contact has been established with you. Their profiles
disappear and they start requesting communication through
email or instant messenger as soon as possible. Most will
let you know during this early stage that they are US
citizens, but must go to the UK or Nigeria for business
soon. They most often claim to be from your area.
They will have exceptionally poor grammar skills. Their
English may be incoherent or phrased in strange ways. In
other words, they are not native English speakers. It shows
in their writing. They may often use text words such as
"how r u?" or "I'm L8."
The habits of these scammers are odd. They are often not
available during nights or weekends. They may keep unusual
hours for your "area" because they are really overseas.
They change their names, profile names, or screen names
often.
The Romance Scam often involves the old "Nigerian scam"
methodology that was once popular through email. It's
simply a new twist on an old con.
There are several things that may happen. You may receive a
box of merchandise they claim they can't ship where they
need to. They may even send you a check that they can't
cash for some reason. They will likely want you to cash
this at your bank, withdraw a certain amount, and send it
back.
The problem with all of this is that these are often felony
acts. The check you receive will not be good. The packages
you receive may be stolen merchandise. The gifts they send
may be purchased with a stolen credit card. There are
reports that people have been arrested at the bank when
attempting to cash these checks.
If you don't encounter any issues and can withdraw the
funds from the check to send to your "boy/girlfriend" you
will be responsible for paying it all back. Since most of
these individuals work from a foreign country, there is no
way to arrest, convict, or charge them legally. Since
everything they tell you will be fraudulent, you will not
have any insight to their true identity.
If you find someone and the situation is promising, do a
background check. Monitor the situation as closely as
possible. You may be emotionally vulnerable, but scammers
do not care. They will use everything you tell them against
you.
If you find yourself in this situation and haven't taken
any precautions, immediately go to your area police. If you
live in a rural area, go to the State Police as they will
likely have far more resources to help you. If you are
receiving items through the mail, go directly to your local
post office and ask for their help.
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Mike Rao writes on Crime Prevention and Personal Safety.
His websites are:
http://www.peppersprayking.com
http://www.personalprotectionproductsofohio.com
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